Gas Toast – Part 2

Please read Gas Toast – Part 1 first. This is the easy part of the recipe. I kid you not. Completely true. We’re getting into the really hard part of the recipe.


Gas – If you don’t have a gas line and a stove that uses the gas coming from the gas line, you’ll have to move houses. Sell this one and move to one that has a gas line and a gas stove.

Told ya it was difficult.


The Gizmo
The Gizmo

Next: get this gizmo. Very useful piece of equipment. Very useful indeed if you want to seko rotis….. Not that I use it for that purpose. No, I use it to make Gas Toast.


Here is how. Once you’ve gone through all the steps listed in Gas Toast – Part 1, find a long bread knife. Flip loaf over head down and slice off as many slices as you wish to eat. Wrap the rest of the bread in plastic wrap and set aside.

Now take one slice and place on gizmo. Light up the gas burner. Turn on the exhaust. Especially, if you have a smoke sensor….. 🙂 Now hold gizmo exactly between 2.3578214 and 2.89423 inches above the flame. In about 55.5685 seconds the toast will be completely charred. Throw it away and try another slice. This time watch it like a hawk, inspecting to make sure it gets toasted to the desired level. (You can adjust the flame too, you know. There is that knob there. It’s there for a reason.) Hold it off the flame and flip slice over. Toast the other side. Remove to plate. Apply butter as per taste.

Bite. Chew. Repeat.

I will say this. When you ( read “You” as “I”) have an upset stomach, this is the ultimate comfort food. When down and feeling blue, this is the #2 ranked comfort food.

No prizes are being awarded for knowing what the #1 ranked comfort food is.

Did you solve the 176-671 reference quiz question I gave you in Gas Toast – Part 1? Lazy bones!


Gas Toast – Part 1.

It is a loaf of bread, take my word for it… and completely edible. I ate it and lived to tell the tale…

It has been a while since I wrote a recipe. Now, I know, I know, you still haven’t got over the fact that it took you 890 words to get to the actual chicken kebab recipe and it is 2 hours of your life you won’t get back. What? It doesn’t take you 2 hours to read 890 words of flowing, stream of consciousness prose? What’s that? Fifteen? Hours? oh, ok, minutes! So what are you complaining about??

Anyway, here we go, right away into the recipe. ( This has got to be the shortest preamble I’ve written for a post.. I mean, here we are at just about a 100 words and we’re talking about getting into the recipe… I must be losing my touch.)

So what is gas toast, then? To answer this we must go back in time. For this is a highly complex recipe. It uses techniques that have stood the test of time. By which I mean it’s a very old recipe. It must be at least 40 years old. That’s old to a millenial. For someone like me in their early 30s, it’s an aspirational goal. Oh alright… I know you know and I needn’t lie about my age. Got it. Shall we move on? To the recipe? We shall? Orlrighty then! Continue reading “Gas Toast – Part 1.”

Breakfast Options

English: Beans on toast
English: Beans on toast (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Yes, I’ve been lax. I’ve been busy working on things. What? Oh, editing The Play ( still nameless, after all these days ). As well as The Play ( still nameless ), I also made major headway in anchoring The Memoirs, ( not nameless at all. On the contrary has rather too many names. A larger discussion of those names is probably out of scope of this article.) Why, you ask?

Well, look at the header. It says “Breakfast”. Quite clearly. So naturally the thing that comes to mind is cricket. The game, not the insect. Though, I suppose, there are breakfasts that can be made from crickets, the insects, not the game. I woke up today with the news that there is a World Cup of Cricket on somewhere in India and the hosts India were meeting Pakistan. So naturally, when the rains came crashing down and delayed the start, it gave me the chance to focus on my breakfast.

My breakfast this morning was unusual. Tea, milky and sweet with a soft untoasted slice of white bread and butter. Followed 20 minutes later by the usual breakfast of a large cup of coffee and 2 pieces of rye toast made from Polish rye with sunflower seeds. In another departure from the norm, neither slice of toast was covered in marmalade. How weird and interesting is that?

It’s not? Well, anyway, here I am at 10:45pm with the day almost done. I’ve had my dinner. Bhel puri, papri chaat, a slice of pizza, some Sprite to wash it down, my cetirizine pill followed by the steroids and antibiotics I’m on right now. Oh, in between I had a business meeting where I had a small coffee, dark roast, black, and small slice of pie. I came home late for lunch and had rajmah chawal ( red kidney beans curry with rice, if non-Indian) with spicy mango pickle at breakneck speed because I was so hungry. I washed that down with 1.5 kiwi fruit.

Now you’re thinking, is he a nut or nut case? Well, I haven’t had any nuts today. Talking of which, have you ever tried to incorporate nuts into your breakfast? Well, I haven’t. No one has. Nuts for breakfast? That’s just crazy! No, breakfast should be fun, nutty in a non-nutty way, by which I mean, there should be no nuts involved. No, no. Bread, beans, onions. Possibly bacon, ham, potatoes. Those are the basic building blocks of a breakfast. Sausages! So let’s get to some recipes. I shall put a couple up. For the Veggie people and then the non-Veggies as well.

Veggie – Beans on toast.

A very simple way to make a great breakfast.


  • Bread. Cut thick slices. Any good white, sandwich loaf will do.
  • A can of baked beans in tomato sauce.
  • An onion.
  • Green chillies.
  • Salt and pepper.


  • Toast bread.
  • Chopp onions finely.
  • Chop the chillies finely too.
  • Open can of beans, pour into a saucepan, light stove, heat beans through.
  • Place toast in plate. Scoop warm beans over the toast, generously.
  • Top with onions, chillies, salt and pepper.
  • Best with coffee, preferably black, with one sugar.


Non-Veggie: Spiced Hashbrowns with Bacon 


  • Potatoes (2 or 3)
  • Bacon strips ( about 3-4)
  • 1 onion
  • Salt and pepper
  • Green chillies ( optional )
  • Tabasco ( optional )
  • Fresh coriander ( optional )
  • Cast iron pan
  • Plate with paper to drain bacon.


  • Chop potatoes into little dice.
  • Slice onions into short slices.
  • In a cold cast iron pan, lay down bacon strips, turn on heat. Cook bacon, till almost crispy, remove and drain on paper on a plate. Set aside.
  • Don’t throw away that fat in the bottom of the pan!
  • In the same pan, chuck in the onions and potatoes.
  • If using the green chillies add those too.
  • Let it cook, stirring occasionally, about 3-5 minutes.
  • Add salt, pepper, tabasco to taste.
  • Rough chop cooked bacon, crumble over the mixture and let it cook until potatoes are done.
  • Chop up fresh coriander, sprinkle and turn off the heat. Mix.

Serve with toast and coffee.

I suppose both breakfast options above could be had with eggs made anyway you like. I don’t know. Eggs and I maintain diplomatic relations of a decidedly frosty nature these days, so while I can give you lovely eggy recipes. I won’t.

No. I remain adamant. I shall reclaim my curmudgeonly right to say no to eggs. For now. Maybe another day, if  you all write to me and clamour for my egg recipes, I will.

Until then, drink coffee. It’s good for you. I’m sure there’s a study somewhere that proves it.

Banana Bread

6-20160220_221917I haven’t given you a recipe in a while. I haven’t give you a story in a while. I haven’t given you a rant.. uh, well, ok, it hasn’t been that long since I put up a rant. Anyway, here is a recipe, an honest to goodness recipe. But first!

Buy bananas.

Forget they exist for a few days. Tut tut as they ripen, uneaten. Watch anxiously as they go from a yellowish green to Continue reading “Banana Bread”

Roti Shapes and the Brain

Deutsch: Chapati / Roti / Indisches Fladenbrot
Deutsch: Chapati / Roti / Indisches Fladenbrot (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

So the question asked is this “Do round rotis taste better than non-round ones?”.

And that is an interesting, very interesting, question. It brings to the fore many concepts that we possibly take for granted, but perhaps should review more often. So let’s take a look at the question and break it down.

First, we consider the definition of “roti”. Does this include Continue reading “Roti Shapes and the Brain”